Hannah buys some hideous long johns at CAL Ranch that come equipped with a legitimate butt-flap and we make the first snowman of the season.
I'd say it was a success.
Showing posts with label hilarity. Show all posts
Showing posts with label hilarity. Show all posts
Sunday, November 6, 2011
First Snowfall
Hannah buys some hideous long johns at CAL Ranch that come equipped with a legitimate butt-flap and we make the first snowman of the season.
I'd say it was a success.
Tuesday, November 1, 2011
Happy Halloween!...or should I say Happy Steining?
My first Halloween away from home was...a completely ordinary day. Sad.
No costumes.
No trick-or-treaters.
No scary music.
We didn't even watch Charlie Brown and the Great Pumpkin.
We tried. But when we opened up the case it was Charlie Brown Thanksgiving.
Sad.
The only eventful happening happened a couple weeks ago.
My roommates and I decided to take a walk and go out to eat somewhere funky. Like Fong's. Who knew on the way home we would be ambushed and stalked be Frankenstein.....
I will never forget the look on Hannah's face. HA.
Who knew we'd become so famous while living in Rexburg, Idaho?! ;)
Happy Steining!
No costumes.
No trick-or-treaters.
No scary music.
We didn't even watch Charlie Brown and the Great Pumpkin.
We tried. But when we opened up the case it was Charlie Brown Thanksgiving.
Sad.
The only eventful happening happened a couple weeks ago.
My roommates and I decided to take a walk and go out to eat somewhere funky. Like Fong's. Who knew on the way home we would be ambushed and stalked be Frankenstein.....
I will never forget the look on Hannah's face. HA.
Who knew we'd become so famous while living in Rexburg, Idaho?! ;)
Happy Steining!
Saturday, September 24, 2011
Saturday, July 30, 2011
Mid-Life Crisis
No, I'm not old enough to have a mid-life crisis.
This is a mid-life crisis:
This is a mid-life crisis:
HA!
I laughed for fifteen minutes when I saw this hanging on our fridge!
Apparently when you get to a certain age you don't realize you are supposed to change positions in a photo booth.
Oh man. In the third picture you can just see in my mom's face the realization that something is not right. Then of course, she blocks the next picture with a peace sign.
I love my parents.
Sunday, May 22, 2011
"And I Present....
Most Likely To Be Eaten By A Whale....
To:
Shelby Frampton!"
WHAT?!
What?
Ya. I have no clue what that's supposed to mean.
At the Senior Dinner Dance last night, out of the 700 seniors at Lone Peak High School, the fifteen or so awards given, "Most Likely To Be Eaten By A Whale" just had to be one of them. And it had to be presented to me.
Even though I am secretly happy just by the fact I got any sort of award at all, I'm still in confusion.
One explanation I received:
"Whales eat seals. They must mean you look like a seal."
Another:
"Maybe it's because you are lying and deceitful and don't follow God's will like Jonah. He was eaten by a whale."
(Ouch)
And a third:
"It's cause you always have such CRAZY stories to tell to people!"
I think I will go with the latter. What do you think?
Then I got slightly worried. Since, you know, it was supposed to be the end of the world tomorrow. Maybe it wasn't the end of the entire world. But it could have been the end of MY world. Eaten by a whale?! Yes. I probably would have died. And that would have the end of me. The end of my blog too. So be grateful. Although, being eaten by a whale would be a sweet death story...
No worries. I survived.
So did everyone else.
Sorry if you wasted money of outlandish things or got injured doing something crazy before "the end of the world". But good for those who repented! Don't procrastinate!
I'm alive.
Confused.
Mildy pleased.
And REALLY hoping people don't think I look like a seal.
To:
Shelby Frampton!"
WHAT?!
What?
Ya. I have no clue what that's supposed to mean.
At the Senior Dinner Dance last night, out of the 700 seniors at Lone Peak High School, the fifteen or so awards given, "Most Likely To Be Eaten By A Whale" just had to be one of them. And it had to be presented to me.
Even though I am secretly happy just by the fact I got any sort of award at all, I'm still in confusion.
One explanation I received:
"Whales eat seals. They must mean you look like a seal."
Another:
"Maybe it's because you are lying and deceitful and don't follow God's will like Jonah. He was eaten by a whale."
(Ouch)
And a third:
"It's cause you always have such CRAZY stories to tell to people!"
I think I will go with the latter. What do you think?
Then I got slightly worried. Since, you know, it was supposed to be the end of the world tomorrow. Maybe it wasn't the end of the entire world. But it could have been the end of MY world. Eaten by a whale?! Yes. I probably would have died. And that would have the end of me. The end of my blog too. So be grateful. Although, being eaten by a whale would be a sweet death story...
No worries. I survived.
So did everyone else.
Sorry if you wasted money of outlandish things or got injured doing something crazy before "the end of the world". But good for those who repented! Don't procrastinate!
I'm alive.
Confused.
Mildy pleased.
And REALLY hoping people don't think I look like a seal.
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
My Middle Name Is Certainly NOT Grace.
I am not graceful. Whenever I accidently don't sit in my chair but sit on air instead, or my ankle is almost broken by my incorrect heel-usage, or I fall down a mountain and land on a tree, or I try to move my chair like a train but it snags the carpet and I do a half circle through the air and get stuck in between my desk and the floor, or when I am laughing SOOOOO hard that I get all sweaty and have to pee and I run out of the classroom, etc. When these things happen, I laugh jovially and with a charming smile I look up at the person closest to me, flip my hair and tell them in a sultry voice "My middle name is grace, you know?" And I almost wink. But I don't.
This is a defensive mechanism.
My middle name is not Grace. It's Alyse.
Also, I am not saying this because I actually believe I am in any way graceful.
It's a defense mechanism. (Something to do with saying the exact opposite of what you really mean.)
This realization was confirmed Saturday. I can go a couple months convincing myself that I can be lovely and eloquent; then moments come along that....DESTROY ALL LADY-LIKE PROGRESS.
And now I present: One of Shelby's completely ridiculous embaressing stories that happen frequently, but bring much joy and laughter to all who occupy the same relative space.
Once upon a time, Hannah and I play this game called Iron Chef. It's wonderful. Saturday morning we had this completely charming new friend of mine come and play with us! Secret Ingredient: Bananas. After battling for the banana cream pudding in the closet and throwing flour on each others backs, I pulled through and won. Woo! We then decided to sit on the sun-kissed roof and discussed Dumbledore taking the light out of the lamp post across the street with his Deluminator. It was perfect time of day to frolick through a meadow. So, in the sunset we skipped and laughed in a meadow. With some daisies. Then we pet a llama and it almost kissed my friend. We traveled to the top of the valley and let the cool breeze blow through our hair.
Everything was going swimmingly. I felt pretty. I felt smart. I felt witty. We went on adventures. It was sunny and blue. What could go wrong right?
We are then cordially invited to a SUMMER/GRADUATION BASH! We decide to drop by. Fashionably late, of course. This is where we went wrong.
At first things are fine. We played some soccer and jumped on the tramp. Then the hostess pulls together a game of Wiffle Ball. (Baseball with one of those plastic holey red balls and a really small field). Progressively through the day my digestive system is working, as digestive systems do, and in the middle of the game I realize I REALLY have to go to the bathroom. So I wait for the teams to switch from being up to bat to playing the field. This time arrives and I tell everyone to wait for just a minute as I quickly relieve myself. As I am in a wonderful mood, I don't want to keep people waiting, and I am slightly distracted; I RUN up the porch stairs and through the open door into the house.
In reality, that doorway had two doors. One was open. One was a screen.
SMACK.
That is the noise created when I ran, RAN, into the screen door.
RIP.
That is the noise of the screen door ripping in half because the force of my weight plus the momentum of my body was too much to handle.
Eeeeeeeerggggphm.
That is the noise of me falling onto the floor in the middle of the kitchen with the hostess' family waiting inside.
HAHAHAHA.
That is the noise of everyone laughing at me.
...At least I didn't pee my pants.
I begged for forgiveness.
Cried laughing for a while.
Then fell into a thorn bush and ripped a bleeding gash into my leg.
My middle name is NOT Grace.
This is a defensive mechanism.
My middle name is not Grace. It's Alyse.
Also, I am not saying this because I actually believe I am in any way graceful.
It's a defense mechanism. (Something to do with saying the exact opposite of what you really mean.)
This realization was confirmed Saturday. I can go a couple months convincing myself that I can be lovely and eloquent; then moments come along that....DESTROY ALL LADY-LIKE PROGRESS.
And now I present: One of Shelby's completely ridiculous embaressing stories that happen frequently, but bring much joy and laughter to all who occupy the same relative space.
Once upon a time, Hannah and I play this game called Iron Chef. It's wonderful. Saturday morning we had this completely charming new friend of mine come and play with us! Secret Ingredient: Bananas. After battling for the banana cream pudding in the closet and throwing flour on each others backs, I pulled through and won. Woo! We then decided to sit on the sun-kissed roof and discussed Dumbledore taking the light out of the lamp post across the street with his Deluminator. It was perfect time of day to frolick through a meadow. So, in the sunset we skipped and laughed in a meadow. With some daisies. Then we pet a llama and it almost kissed my friend. We traveled to the top of the valley and let the cool breeze blow through our hair.
Everything was going swimmingly. I felt pretty. I felt smart. I felt witty. We went on adventures. It was sunny and blue. What could go wrong right?
We are then cordially invited to a SUMMER/GRADUATION BASH! We decide to drop by. Fashionably late, of course. This is where we went wrong.
At first things are fine. We played some soccer and jumped on the tramp. Then the hostess pulls together a game of Wiffle Ball. (Baseball with one of those plastic holey red balls and a really small field). Progressively through the day my digestive system is working, as digestive systems do, and in the middle of the game I realize I REALLY have to go to the bathroom. So I wait for the teams to switch from being up to bat to playing the field. This time arrives and I tell everyone to wait for just a minute as I quickly relieve myself. As I am in a wonderful mood, I don't want to keep people waiting, and I am slightly distracted; I RUN up the porch stairs and through the open door into the house.
In reality, that doorway had two doors. One was open. One was a screen.
SMACK.
That is the noise created when I ran, RAN, into the screen door.
RIP.
That is the noise of the screen door ripping in half because the force of my weight plus the momentum of my body was too much to handle.
Eeeeeeeerggggphm.
That is the noise of me falling onto the floor in the middle of the kitchen with the hostess' family waiting inside.
HAHAHAHA.
That is the noise of everyone laughing at me.
...At least I didn't pee my pants.
I begged for forgiveness.
Cried laughing for a while.
Then fell into a thorn bush and ripped a bleeding gash into my leg.
My middle name is NOT Grace.
Saturday, April 9, 2011
My First Day of Spring Break
I receive a text.
"We need you. Come upstairs" -Taylor
I walk upstairs.
I look around.
Then I about had a heartattack.
An interesting start to my Spring Break.
No worries. They are wearing swimsuits.
But still.
My brothers: hilarious.
"We need you. Come upstairs" -Taylor
I walk upstairs.
I look around.
Then I about had a heartattack.
An interesting start to my Spring Break.
No worries. They are wearing swimsuits.
But still.
My brothers: hilarious.
Monday, April 4, 2011
A Tale of Two Bunnies
Once upon a time there was a girl named Shelby.
She came home one night and
THIS:
"REALLY?! ME?! NO WAY! WOOHOO! YIPEE! THAT WOULD BE SO MUCH FUN!"
(Most of the excitement coming from the Starburst ;)
The next day she thought long and hard how to answer. There's no way to top flowers, chocolate eggs, a stuffed bunny, and a witty poem.
Then it came to her.
She waited patiently at her door for her little sister to arrive. As soon as she did she gave her the biggest hug and asked her for the HUGEST favor.
This is what came of it:
She came home one night and
THIS:
Awaited her in the kitchen.
To find out who the mysterious pursuer could be, she read swiftly through a clever poem (something about a bunny getting it's eggs stolen. She wasn't really sure what it said....she was too excited to open the eggs)
She opened the eggs and what to her wondering eyes did appear,
"Will You Go To Prom With Me?"
CHRISTIAN.
"REALLY?! ME?! NO WAY! WOOHOO! YIPEE! THAT WOULD BE SO MUCH FUN!"
(Most of the excitement coming from the Starburst ;)
The next day she thought long and hard how to answer. There's no way to top flowers, chocolate eggs, a stuffed bunny, and a witty poem.
Then it came to her.
She waited patiently at her door for her little sister to arrive. As soon as she did she gave her the biggest hug and asked her for the HUGEST favor.
This is what came of it:
Isn't she the best?
"I was Hoppin' you'd ask!" (Clever, I know)
Asia practicing her "hop". We found out hopping with lots of light Easter eggs doesn't turn out too well...
As Asia turned around and hopped out of sight....TA-DA! The answer: YES! (For some reason Asia thought this was the most ingenious thing to do)
(Asia had no knowledge these pictures were taken... Don't tell her please. I just HAD TO. I HAD TO! They are priceless. No offense meant. Let's just say the outfit was a tinsy winsy bit too small. As long as she didn't "hop" away too enthusiastically, I think it'll be alright)
I can't wait
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