Mrs. Gaunither

It's silly, really.

For the first time today, I cried about moving. It wasn't my friends that triggered it. Or even my family.

It was my piano students.

I taught them today and I realize all their books are in new piano bags. Marcus exclaims it's because of Mrs. Gaunither.

"Who's Mrs. Gaunither?" I ask.

"Our new piano teacher."






Oh.






Right.

I knew this had to happen. I knew I was leaving and I couldn't teach them in between semesters. I knew if they wanted to keep learning piano, someone else had to teach them.

But, I wasn't expecting that. They already have a new teacher...

Oh boy, I sorta had to use all my effort to focus on teaching them because I could feel it. The bubbly-stomach thing that tries to come up your throat but you know if it does your eyes will water up. Doesn't make sense how those are all connected.

I've taught them for five years.

And next week, it's our last lesson.

Then they'll be going to Mrs. Gaunither.

Miss Shelby, Mrs. Gaunither? The name just sounds less friendly!

Yes. My imaginary Mrs. Gaunither is balding. And has ruby red creepy long nails. And is somewhat like the Trunchbull.

But...what if she's a better teacher than I am? What if I am seriously lacking in my teaching abilities and my students love her and become musical prodigies? What if they are relieved to have someone more capable, finally?

What if they never say, "Thank you Miss Shelby!"?

Ever, again.

I'm gonna miss hearing that.

A lot.

A "squeeze my eyes shut" Day:

You know when everything is going right? 

Happiness.
Love.
Laughter.
Health.
Accomplishments.
Friends.
Family.
Hope.
Then all the sudden...

CRUSH. DASH. DESTROY. TERMINATE. RIP. TEAR. DEMOLISH. GONE.


Ya. That happened yesterday.
Bad news- My Preference date can't go anymore! I'm not allowed to return the dress. I got sick and missed part of madrigal because I was hacking up a lung in the bathroom. I got tons of homework. Etc.
So, my happiness rapidly died for a while.
Today my day was pretty crappy. Teary-eyed and tired and disappointed I walked to all my classes quite angrily and it's no wonder no one wanted to talk to me.

Then I went to seminary... Oh, the joy of the gospel.
A wonderful girl named Gabi gave a thought. Here it is:

The Fellowship of The Unashamed

I am a part of the fellowship of the Unashamed. I have the Holy Spirit
Power. The die has been cast. I have stepped over the line. The decision has
been made. I am a disciple of Jesus Christ. I won't look back, let up, slow
down, back away, or be still. My past is redeemed, my present makes sense,
and my future is secure. I am finished and done with low living, sight
walking, small planning, smooth knees, colorless dreams, tame visions,
mundane talking, chintzy giving, and dwarfed goals.

I no longer need preeminence, prosperity, position, promotions, plaudits, or
popularity. I don't have to be right, first, tops, recognized, praised,
regarded, or rewarded. I now live by presence, learn by faith, love by
patience, lift by prayer, and labor by power.

My pace is set, my gait is fast, my goal is Heaven, my road is narrow, my
way is rough, my companions few, my Guide is reliable, my mission is clear.
I cannot be bought, compromised, deterred, lured away, turned back, diluted,
or delayed. I will not flinch in the face of sacrifice, hesitate in the
presence of adversity, negotiate at the table of the enemy, ponder at the
pool of popularity, or meander in the maze of
mediocrity.

I won't give up, back up, let up, or shut up until I've preached up, prayed
up, paid up, stored up, and stayed up for the cause of Christ. I am a
disciple of Jesus Christ. I must go until He returns, give until I drop,
preach until all know, and work until He comes.

And when He comes to get His own, He will have no problem recognizing me. My
colors will be clear for "I am not ashamed of the Gospel, because it is the
power of God for the salvation of everyone who believes.." (Romans 1:16)

By Dr. Bob Moorehead

Isn't amazing how applicable that was to my crap attitude? God must have whispered in Gabi's ear I needed to hear that. So I felt a little guilty. But I was inspired. I remembered my philosophy about how it's my choice to be happy. So. I shut my eyes, closed them REAL tight, said a quick prayer, cried a bit, then chose to be happier. I will not let down. I will give till I drop. I will be a disciple of Christ. And I will CHOOSE for myself how to live. I will not let Satan discourage me. I will NOT.

So, once again The Spirit gave me a little slap in the face and made me remember: I have a choice.

And guess what?

It works.

It always does.